14 skills everyone should learn in their 20s.docx

14 skills everyone should learn in their 20s.docx

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14skillseveryoneshouldlearnintheir20s

14skillseveryoneshouldlearnintheir20s

Justbecauseyou'renolongerinschooldoesn'tmeanyou'vegotitallfiguredout.

You'vestillgotplentyofimportantskillslefttolearn—butnowyou'reonyourown.

Tohelpyounavigatethisconfusingtime,wereviewedseveralQuora threads on helpfulskills andwaysto spendtime inyour20sandhighlightedthemostusefulinsights.

Herearethelifeskillsevery20-somethingshouldmaster.

1.Howtojustbehonest

Whenyou'relatetoanappointment,it'stemptingtopintheblameongridlockortraindelays.

Instead, says QuorauserMichaelHoffman,"justapologize.Youdon'thavetogivedetails.'Iplannedpoorly'isahundredtimesbetterthanriskingyourintegritybyinanelyblamingtraffic."

2.Howtoreceivecriticism

Noonelikestobetoldthey'rewrongoreventhattheycouldbedoingsomethingmoreeffectively.AsAbhinavGupta writes,it'seasytoresentthepersoncritiquingyouorcompletelyignorethem.

Nonetheless,Guptasays,"inordertosucceedinlifeyoushouldalwaysacceptcriticismandalwaysrespondpositivelytoitandneverthinkillofpeoplewhopointoutyourmistakes."

3.Howtostartaninterestingconversation

"Conversation-makingisprobablythemostunderratedskill," says DeepakMehta,whoadmitsthathe'sashypersonwho'salwaysfounditdifficult.

Butexperiencehastaughthimthatifyoudaretostrikeupadiscussionwiththepersonnexttoyou,youmightverywellendupwithanewfriend,abusinessconnection,orsomenovelinsightsonanoldtopic.

4.Howtoaskforsomethingyouwant

"Theabilitytoaskistheeasiest,mostunderutilizedskilltocatapultyourcareer," writes ananonymoususer.

Butifyoudon'tmusterupthecouragetorequestaraise,apromotion,orabiggersalesdeal,youhavenochanceofgettingit.

Ifthethoughtofrequestingwhatyouwantmakesyouanxious,theusersuggestspracticinginnon-work-relatedcontexts.Forexample,youcouldaskavendoratafarmer'smarketforalowerpriceonyourvegetables.

"Themoreyouputyourselfinuncomfortablesituations,"theuserwrites,"themorelikelyyou'lldecidethey'renotthatuncomfortableafterall."

5.Howtokeepyourpromises

Maybeyoutoldafriendyou'dshowuptohisbirthdayparty,ormaybeyouagreedtofinishanextraassignmentforyourboss.Whateverthesituation,youshouldmakegoodonyourword.

"Break[yourpromise]andpeoplelosetrustandfaithinyou,which,overtime,isveryhardtomend,"Hoffman says.

6.Howtocommunicateeffectively

Nomatteryourcareerfield,youcanalwaysimprovethewayyouspeakandwrite.

"Thinkaboutwaystochallengeyourselfandtweakhowyouwriteanemailorbehaveinameeting,"theanonymoususer suggests.

Here'sanexample:

"Duringyournextteammeeting,resisttalkingaboutyourideaoropinionrightoffthebat.Instead,counttofive,andifyoustillfeellikeyouhavesomethingrelevanttocontribute,speakup.Ontheflipside,ifyou'reshy,challengeyourselftosaywhatyou'rethinking,insteadofremainingsilent."

7.Howtoberesilient

Therestofyourlifeisboundtoincludesetbacks,sadness,andfrustration（inadditiontojoyandexcitement!

）.CarolynCho says youshoulduseyourearlyadulthoodtofigureouthowtorecoverfrommishaps:

Your20s[are]atimewhenmostarerelativelyfreeoftheresponsibilitiesthatwillincreaseintoyour 30sand40s.Thisisagreattimetoexperiment,fail,andbounceback.Learnhowtorideoutfailureandpersevere.

Lifeisfullofchallenges.The20sareagreattimetotoughenupandstartteachingyourselfhowtobeemotionallyandmentallyresilientenoughtoweatherboththejoysandhardshipstocome.

8.Howtodemonstrategoodtablemanners

"Alotofinterviewstakeplaceovermeals," writes DrewPavilonis.

"Chewingloudly,oreatingwithyourmouthopen,lickingfingersandutensils（yes,I'veseenit）,elbowsonthetable,justshowsalackofmannersandsocialskills."

9.Howtomanageyouranger

SyedMuswairAbbasRizvi argues thatyoucanchannelyourrageandfrustrationinpositivedirectionsinsteadoflashingoutatthepeoplearoundyou.Forexample, research suggeststhatangercanstimulatecreativity,atleasttemporarily.

"Yourangercanempoweryoutodotheunthinkableandunimaginablethings,ifyoujustlearnthearttomasterandmanageyouranger."

10.Howtolivewithinyourmeans

Cho advises youngadultstothinkcarefullyaboutalltheirexpenditures:

"Luxuriesareawonderfulthingonlyifyoucantrulyaffordthem.Don'tbeaslavetofundingalifestylethatwillnotlast.Learntolivemodestlyandsaveup,andthenyouwillhaveearnedtherighttopurchaseyourselfsometreats,inmoderation."

11.Howtodealwithrejection

Manypeopleusetheir20stotrynewexperiences,jobs,andromanticpartners.Someofthoseattemptswillworkout,andsomewon't.

AccordingtoJoeChoi,it'sagoodopportunitytolearnhowtodealwithrejection,whetherit'sfromadreamemployeroradate:

"It'satoughpilltoswallowbutrealizethatrejectionisquitenormal.It'shardlyeverpersonalandmostimportantlyit'snottheendoftheworld.Don'tdwellonit.Keepyourheadhighandkeeptruckingalong."

12.Howtolearnwithoutatextbook

Studyingshouldnotbelimitedtoyourtimeinschool. It "canbeanywhere,anytime,andwithanyone," writesLennyKho."Keepyourmindwideopen."

Youshouldalwaysbeseekingoutnewwaystoexpandyourmind. Readbooks,practicespeaking foreignlanguages,ortakemusiclessons—whateverexcitesyoumost.

13.Howtoacceptthepossibilityofchange

Research bypsychologistDanGilbertsuggeststhatwehaveahardtimeimagininghowmuchwe'llchangeinthefuture.

Soitmakessensethat Choisays,"It'snearimpossibletoplanwhereyou'llbeafewyearsfromnow."

Choiuseshisowntrajectoryasanexample.Duringcollegehestudiedengineering,andheneverimaginedhe'dmovetoruralEasternEuropetoharvestcornafterward—buthedid.WhilelivinginEurope,heneverthoughthe'dlatermovetoafancybuildinginNewYorkCity—butthat'sexactlywhathappened.

Expecttobe surprised（hopefullypleasantly）bythewayyourlifeunfolds.

14.Howtobepatient

There'snoquestionthatit'simportanttobeambitiousandtoworkhardtoachieveyourgoals—whethertheyincludelandingaspotintheC-suiteorbuyingahouse.

Buttrynottogetfrustratedif,at25,youstillhaven'tscoredapromotionorsavedupenoughforadownpayment.

Takeatip fromSteveKobrin:

"Goodthingssimplydonothappenovernight.Theytaketimetonurtureandcultivate.Theytakealotofwork.Alotofthought.Alotoftrialanderror,andlearningfromyourmistakes."