SOUTH PARK1201.docx

SOUTH PARK1201.docx

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SOUTHPARK1201

SOUTHPARK

12X01-TONSILTROUBLE

OriginalAirdate（COM）:

12-MAR-2008

"SOUTHPARK"andotherrelatedentitiesareowned,（TM）and?

byTREYPARKER&MATTSTONEviaCOMEDYCENTRALandCOMEDYPARTNERSinassociationwithIMPORTANTTELEVISION.Thistranscriptispostedherewithouttheirpermission,approval,authorizationorendorsement.Anyreproduction,duplication,distributionordisplayofthismaterialinanyformorbyanymeansisexpresslyprohibited.Itisabsolutelyforbiddentouseitforcommercialgain.Forentertainmentandeducationalpurposesonly.Noinfringementintended.

==========================

SUMMARY:

==========================

Cartman抯routinetonsillectomygoeshorriblywrongandhe'sdiagnosedwithAIDS.WhenKylefindsout,hecan'thelpbutlaugh,sinceCartmanusuallylaughsatpeoplewhosuffersomemisfortuneorother.Cartmanmakessurehedoesn'tsufferalone.

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TRANSCRIPT:

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[Aclose-upofatonguedepressorholdingatonguedown,andthesoundofaboygoing"AHHHHHH."ThecamerapansouttorevealadentistlookinginsideCartman'smouth.Lianestandsnearby,watching.TheyareallinCartman'sroom.]

Cartman:

AHHHHHH.

Dentist:

Well,there'snodoubtaboutit.Thosetonsilsneedtocomeout.

Cartman:

What?

Liane:

Uhwhatexactlydoesthatentail,doctor?

Dentist:

It'saverysimpleoperation.We'lljustputyoutosleep,Eric,andwhenyouwakeupyou'llbetonsil-free.

Cartman:

[abithoarse]Nuh,noway.I'mnotgoingtothehospital,mom!

Dentist:

Oh,Ithoughtyouwereatoughkid.You'renotscaredofhospitals,areyou?

Cartman:

[hidinghisfearsomewhat]No,I'mnotscared.Ijust...Idon'twantmytonsiilsout,that'sall.

Dentist:

[beginspackinghistoolkitonCartman'sdresser]Wellthen,Iguessyoudon'twantallthe"icecream"yougetafterthesurgeryeither.

Cartman:

[leansforwardandlooksatthedentist]Icecream?

Dentist:

Beashametogiveallthatfreeicecreamtothebigboyswhoaren'tscaredofthehospitals.

Liane:

Whattayasay,champ?

Thinkyoucantoughitout?

[thedentistreturnstoCartman'sbed]

Cartman:

Well,youdidsayfreeicecream?

[smiles.LianeandthedentistlaughheartilyasthedentiststrokesCartman'shair]

[Hell'sPassHospital,day.LianesitsbyCartman'sbedinarecoveryroom]

Liane:

Poopsiekins,wakeup.Wwakeup,honey.

Cartman:

[openshiseyes]Uh...it...it'sover?

Liane:

That'sright.Youdidit,poopsiekins.

Cartman:

It'sover!

Ididn'tfeelanything.Youwereright,mom!

Liane:

I'msoproudofyou,Eric.

Cartman:

Allright,sowhere'smyicecream?

Liane:

Oh!

Here'sthedoctornow.[thedentistenterswithtwonurses,onemale,theotherfemale]Hi,doctor.

Cartman:

He-youwereright,doctor.Everythingisokay.

Dentist:

No,it'snot.Eric,I'mafraidthatwe'veaccidentallyinfectedyouwiththeAIDSvirus.[Lianeisshocked,Cartmanlooksather]

Liane:

Whaat?

?

?

Cartman:

What'sthatsupposedtomean?

!

Dentist:

Duringthetonsilsurgerywehadtosupplyyouwithdonorblooda,mistakewasmadeandyouweregivenbloodcontaminatedwithHIV.Itwasaoneinabillionfluke.

Cartman:

IhaveAIDS?

!

Dentist:

Notyet,butwe'veconfirmedthatyounowhavethevirusthatcausesAIDS.Weareverysorry.

Cartman:

Sorry?

!

YougavemeAIDSandyou'resorry?

!

[hisangerrisesuntilhecanbarelycontainit]

Liane:

Oh,mypoorlittlebaby.

Cartman:

Mom,yousaidnothin'wouldgowrong!

Liane:

[breaksdownandcries]OhGod!

Ohno!

Cartman:

No.No,thisisajoke,right?

!

Thisisajoke!

Ican'thaveAIDS!

!

Dentist:

We'regoingtodoeverythinginourpowertomakethisuptoyou,Eric.Forstarters,IthinkIoweyousomeicecream.[motionstoit,andthefemalenursegetsit.SheputsalargecoveredplatteronCartman'sbedandremovedsthelid.Therearetwosundaesontheplatter,butCartmanbrushesthemofftheplatterwiththebackofhishand]

Cartman:

Fuckyouricecream,yousaidI'dbefine!

!

YouallsaidI'dbefine!

!

Liane:

[breaksdownagain]MybabyhasHIV!

[sobsuncontrollably]

Cartman:

No!

NOOO!

!

[SouthParkElementary,nextday,theteachers'lounge.PrincipalVictoriaistherewithMr.Mackey,Mr.Adler,Ms.Garrison,theBroflovskis,theStotches,theMcCormicks,anothercouple,andanotheradult-adoctor]

PrincipalVictoria:

Thankyouforcoming,everyone.Boys,pleasetakeaseat.[Stan,Kyle,Butters,andKennyallentertheroomandtakesomeseats]

Stan:

What'sgoingon?

Areweintrouble?

PrincipalVictoria:

Boys,thereasonwecalledyouallinisbecauseoneofyourfriendshasaseriousillness.[placesbothhandsoverherheart]EricCartmanhasbeendiagnosedwithHIV.

Stan:

[theboysareshocked]What?

?

Butters:

Ohno...

Doctor: