商务写作模版.docx
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商务写作模版.docx
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商务写作模版
评分标准
Task1
分数
全部完成大体要求,包含所有内容点,阅读不费力。
5
很好完成答题要求,包含所有内容点,阅读需要一些努力。
4
答题令人满意,包含两条内容点
3
一条内容点也没能完成,和(或)有明显的遗漏或不相关内容
2
不能完成任务;没有提到内容点,内容几乎不相关,可能误解题目要求。
1
没有相关的回答或表达方式单一,不能给分
0
评分标准:
级别
Task2
分数
5
全部完成答题要求
●包含全部4个内容点。
●语言自信和有强烈的表达愿望;由于强烈愿望和没有阻碍而错误较少
●多样化的语言结构和丰富的词汇量。
●有效地组织,适当的使用一些简单的连接方式。
●语域和格式完全适当。
给读者的印象极佳。
9或10分
4
较好的完成答题要求
●包含3或4条内容点。
●有使用语言的强烈愿望;一些没有妨碍的错误。
●结构和词汇范围超过要求。
●大体上组织较好,注意前后呼应。
●语域和格式总体来说适当。
给读者的印象良好。
7或8分
3
尚能达到答题要求
●包含3条内容点。
●出现一些错误,但不妨碍交流。
●结构和词汇掌握范围适度。
●组织和连贯性总体上令人满意。
●语域和格式尚可,虽然并不完全成功。
给读者满意的印象。
5或6分
2
不能完全达到答题要求
●包含了2或3条内容点。
●大量错误,有时妨碍交流。
●结构、词汇掌握范围有限。
●内容条理不清、不连贯,造成理解困难。
给读者的印象不佳。
3或4分
1
未能达到答题要求
●包含1或2条内容点。
●严重不规范,经常出现基本错误。
●题目要求的结构和词汇几乎没有提到。
●缺乏组织,造成交流失败。
●几乎没有使用适当的语域和格式。
给读者的印象极差。
1或2分
0
什么要求也没完成。
字数少于所需字数的25%,或是完全不能辨认或是完全不切题。
0分
6C原则
1.准确(correctness)
包括四层意义,即阅读人能理解、接受的英语水平;使用精确措词,传达准确信息;正确地使用语法和标点符号;拼写正确。
(1)恰当的语言风格
请比较下面两组例词:
Formal
Informal
approximately
inquire
ascertain
obtain
assist
participate
construct
purchase
contribute
sufficient
difficult
utilize
About
Ask
findout
receive
help
share
build
buy
give
enough
hard
use
(2)准确的措词和信息
下面列出的是一系列极易混淆的单词及词组,请注意区分:
alot/allot
allright/alright
cannot/cannot
differentfrom/differentthan
.dueto/becauseof
effect/affect
fewer/less
lie/lay
principal/principle
that/which
their/them/they're
waitfor/waiton
who/whom
(3)正确的语法和标点符号
2.清楚(Clarity)
(1)逻辑布局(LogicalOrganization)
常用的逻辑布局方法包括:
①因果关系(Cause&Effect)
②时间顺序(ChronologicalDevelopment)
③序列顺序(SequentialDevelopment)
④比较(Comparison)
⑤一般到特殊(FromGeneraltoSpecific)
⑥特殊到一般(FromSpecifictoGeneral)
(2)合理构架句群与段落(Well-WrittenSentences&Paragraphs)
例句:
修改前:
MarshallCorporationwasfoundedfortyyearsago,anditnowhasbranchofficesinfourstates,anditemploysnearly400individuals.
修改后:
MarshallCorporationwasfoundedfortyyearsago.Withbranchofficesinfourstates,itnowemploysnearly400individuals.
(3)统一性与一致性(UnityandCoherence)
(4)强调(Emphasis)
①位置
②重复
③数量
④技巧
(5)将句中关系紧密的词尽量靠近。
比较下面三对句子:
A.TheyboughtabicycleinBeijinginasmallshopwhichcosts$25.00.
Theyboughtabicyclefor$25.00inasmallshopinBeijing.
B.Hewaswarnednottodrinkwatereveninarestaurantwhichhadnotbeenboiled.
Hewaswarnednottodrinkwaterwhichhadnotbeenboiled.
C.Thosewhoworkrapidlygetillintheseconditions.
Thosewhoworkintheseconditionsrapidlygetill.
(6)避免在同一个句子中使用意义不同的同一个字。
Weshalltakeafirmlinewiththefirm.
Weshalltakeastronglinewiththefilm.
3.简洁(Conciseness)
A.Wehavebeguntoexportourmachinetocountriesabroad.
Wehavebeguntoexportourmachines.
B.IntheeventthatyouspeaktoMr.Woodinregardtoproduction,askhimtogiveconsiderationtothedeliveryschedule.
IfyouspeaktoMr.Woodaboutproduction,askhimtoconsiderthedeliveryschedule.
C.Werequirefurniturewhichisofthenewtype.
Werequirenew-typefurniture.
(1)使用简洁的语言(Usesimplelanguage)
尽量使用避免使用
pleasewillyoubegoodenoughto
preferexpressapreferencefor
becauseforthereasonthat
(2)少用陈词滥调(Omittriteexpressions)
asthecasemaybe
ithascometomyattention
atanearlyage
availyourselfofthisopportunity
previousto
crackofdawn
pursuanttoyourrequest
takethelibertyto
duetothefactthat
thankingyouinadvance
enclosedherein
thisistoinformyou
underseparatecover
withkindestregards
Iwishtostate
(3)避免冗长的表达方式和不必要的重复(avoidwordyexpressions&unnecessaryrepetition)。
WordyConcise
1.Wewouldliketoplease
2.ForthemonthofAugustforAugust
3.Pursuanttotheendofthisweeknow
4.Alongperiodoftimealongtime
5.Atthistimenow
6.Isatthistimeis
7.Theweightwashigherthantheweightwasgreaterthan
8.Iexpectedittobeexpected
9.Duringtheyearof1995during1995
10.Forthedevelopmentoffordeveloping
11.InthecityofDallasinDallas
12.Theproblemwasthatthecarwouldnotthecarwouldnotstart
start
13.Squareinshapesquare
14.inaccordancewithyourrequestyourequested
15.Signonthefrontofthisformsignthisform
16.Duringthetimethatwhile
17.Consensusofopinionweagree
18.Rememberthefactthatremember
19,Heldameetingmet
20.thisisthesituationatthistimenow
(4)删改无关紧要的成份(Removeunneededfacts)
A.Itshouldbenotedthatthisisthebestwecando,
B.Foryourinformationweencloseacatalogue.
C.Pleasebeadvisedthatwehavereceivedyourinvoice.
1.assoonaspossiblebyJuly10
2.asyouindicatedinyourletterasyouindicated
3.atalltimesalways
4.atthistimenow
5.continuetoutilizetheoldformuntilstartusingthenewformonFebruary
suchtimeasthenewformisavailable
6.despitethefactthatdespite
7.forthemonthofAprilforApril
8.forobviousreasonthatbecause
9.Iwouldaskthatyouplease
I0.inconjunctionwithwith
11.inthemererecentpastrecently
12.intheunlikelyeventthatif
13.intheunlikelyeventthatIamunabletoifIamlate,pleasedelaythemeeting
beontime,pleasedelaythemeeting
14.inviewofthefactthatbecause
15.itwillbegreatlyappreciatedifyouplease
16.ourproductionofthenewproductwillproductionwillbeginonJuly1
commenceonJuly1
17.pleasebeadvisedthatweexpectyoutopleasereviewthecontract
reviewtheenclosedcontract
(5)多使用主动语态的句子结构以明确表达意思。
PaymentoftheiraccountswillbemadebyJohnsonsnextweek.
Johnsonswillpaytheiraccountsnextweek.
4.具体(Concreteness)
(1)尽可能地提供明确、具体的信息。
A.Thesebrakescanstopacarwithinashortdistance.
TheseGoodsonpowerbrakescanstopa2-toncarwithin24feet.
B.Wehopetheequipmentwillbedeliveredtoourcompanyassoonaspossible.
PleasedelivertheequipmenttoourcompanybeforenextFriday.
C.Sheisafasttypist.
Shetypesatthefastrateof85wordsperminute.
(2)使用具体词汇
A.Wehavenohesitationinadvisingyou…
Weadviseyou…
B.Thepreparationofnewpricescaleisinhand.
Newpricescalesarebeingpreparedthisweek.
C.Duetotheunusualnatureoftherequest,…
Astherequestisunusual,…
agreatdealoftime,bad,large,good,small,around,old,convenient,young,little,majority,minority,most,less
5.完整(Completeness)
自查:
谁(Who)?
什么(What)?
什么时候(When)?
在哪里(Where)?
为什么(Why)?
怎么样(How)?
6.礼貌(Courtesy)
例如:
DearMrs.Walters,
Becauseyoudelayedsolonginyourresponse,ModelGSFisoffstock.Ifyouareinterested,wehavesomesimilarmodelsonhand
Yourstruly,
修改:
DearMrs.Walters
IfIhadknownyourneedsbeforeMay20,IcouldhaveshippedModelGSPimmediately.However,thespringsaledrainedourstock.
TheModelGSK,asimilarinstrument,isinstock,andyoucouldhaveitatthesamepriceastheGSF.Itnormallysellsfor$10,000more.wewillshipitassoonasyougiveustheword.
Yourssincerely
(1)使用礼貌友好的词汇
A.说“Thankyou",例如:
Thankyouforyourletterofyesterday.
Thankyouforyourpromptreply.
Thankyouforhelpingusinthisrespect.
Thankyouforyourinformation.
(2)体谅对方的写作态度(You-Attitude)
Writeremphasis:
WeareshippingyourorderonFriday.
Readeremphasis:
YouwillreceiveyourorderbyMonday,October10.
Writeremphasis:
Toreduceourcosts,wearechangingthebillingsystem.
Readeremphasis:
Toprovideyouwithclearrecords,wearechangingourbillingsystem.
Writeremphasis:
Iwaspleasedtohearthattheprojectwascompleted.
Readeremphasis:
Congratulationsonsuccessfullycompletingtheproject
Writeremphasis:
Weregretthatyouclosedyouraccountwithusaweekago.Webelievethatpeoplemaycomebacktoourbankagainsoonerorlatersincewehaveagoodcreditamongourcustomers.
Readeremphasis:
Aweekagoyouclosedyouraccountwithus.Whateverthereason,wearepleasedtohaveplayedsomesmallpartinyourprogram.Youarecordiallyinvitedtouseour'otherservicesasoccasionmayrequire.
(3)措辞得体(AppropriateWording)
a.避免采用消极性的词汇或句式
NegativeWording:
TheofficeisclosedafterfourO'clock,
PositiveWording:
TheofficeisopenuntilfourO'clock.
NegativeWording:
WhenIreceivedyourcomplaint,Icheckedourrecords.
PositiveWording:
WhenIreceivedyourletter,Icheckedourrecords.
NegativeWording:
Becauseyoufailedtoconnectthecable,thepicturewasblurred.
PositiveWording:
ThepicturewasblurredbecausetheV-2cablewasnotconnectedtotheterminal.
NegativeWording:
Youdidnotreadmyrecentletter.
PositiveWording:
PleaserefertomyJune10thletter.
NegativeWording:
TheExecutiveBoarddidnotreceivenotification.
PositiveWording:
SeveralmembersoftheExecutiveBoardinquiredaboutthetimeofourDecembermeeting.Willyoupleasesendthemafollow-up?
NegativeWording:
Yourletterwasnotclear,
PositiveWording:
IwouldappreciateanoutlineofourmarketingdifferencesthatyoumentionedinyourOctober14thletter.
b.有失礼貌的言词
Wedenyyourclaimcomplaint
Wedonotbelieveconfusion
Wearenotsurecontrary
Wefinditdifficulttounderstandcontrivance
Weexpectdelinquent
Weinsistdeny
Weareforceddisagreeable
Wetakeissueexasperate
Youforgotfailure
Youneglectedignorance
Youfailedtoimpatience
Youmisunderstoodincompetent
Youmustincredible
Youshouldknowinexcusable
Youdonothaveinference
Youaredelinquen
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