46级作文1文档格式.docx
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46级作文1文档格式.docx
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1、统一性
一个段落内的各个句子必须从属于一个中心,任何游离于中心思想之外的句子都是不可取的。
请看下例:
JoeandIdecidedtotakethelongtripwe’dalwayswantedacrossthecountry.Wewerelikeyoungkidsbuyingourcamperandstockingitwithallthenecessitiesoflife.Bellabakesthebestrhubarbpie.WestartedoutinearlyspringfromMinneapolisandheadedwestacrossthenorthernpartofthecountry.Webothenjoyedthosepeoplewemetatthetrailerpark.Joereceivedawatchathisretirementdinner.Tooursurprise,wefoundthatwelikedthewarmsouthernregionsverymuch,andsowedecidedtostayhereinNewMexico.
本段的主题句是段首句,controllingidea(中心思想)是takethelongtripacrossthecountry。
文中出现两个irrelevantsentences,一个是Bellabakesthebestrhubarbpie,这一段是讲的是JoeandI,中间出现一个Bella是不合适的。
还有,Joereceivedawatchathisretirementdinner这一句更是与主题句不相关。
再看一个例子:
MynameisRoseanna,andIliketokeepphysicallyfit.Iusedtoweightwohundredpounds,butIjoinedtheYMCAforanexerciseclassanddietprogram.InoneyearIlosteightypounds.Ifeelmuchbetterandneverwanttohavethatmuchweightonmyfive-feetframeagain.Iboughttwonewsuitcaseslastweek.EverydayIpracticejoggingthreemiles,swimmingfifteenlaps,liftingtwenty-poundweightsandplayingtennisforonehour.Mymotherwasaprematurebaby.
本段的controllingidea是liketodeepphysicallyfit,但段中有两个irrelevantsentences,一个是Iboughttwonewsuitcaseslastweek,另一个是Mymotherwasaprematurebaby。
从上面两个例子可以看出,nativespeakers同样会造出来irrelevantsentences。
卷面上如果这种句子多了,造成偏题或离题,那问题就更严重了。
2、完整性
正像我们前面说得那样,一个段落的主题思想靠推展句来实现,如果只有主题句而没有推展句来进一步交待和充实,就不能构成一个完整的段落。
同样,虽然有推展句,但主题思想没有得到相对圆满的交待,给读者一种意犹未尽的感觉。
这样的段落也不能完成其交际功能。
例如:
Physicalworkcanbeausefulformoftherapyforamindinturmoil.Workconcentratesyourthoughtsonaconcretetask.Besides,itismoreusefultowork----youproducesomethingratherthanmoreanxietyordepression.
本段的主题句是段首句。
本段的两个推展句均不能回答主题句中提出的问题。
什么是“amindinturmoil”(心境不平静)Physicalwork又如何能改变这种情况?
为什么它能起therapy的作用?
读者得不到明确的答案。
由于四级统考的作文部分只要求写一篇100~120个词的三段式短文,每一段只有大约40个词左右,因此,要达到完整就必须尽可能地简明。
Itisnotalwaystruethatagoodpictureisworthathousandwords.Oftenwritingismuchclearerthanapicture.Itissometimesdifficulttofigureoutwhatapicturemeans,butacarefulwritercanalmostalwaysexplainit.
段首句所表达的主题思想是一种看法,必须有具体事例加以验证。
上述两个推展句只是在文字上对主题作些解释,整个段落内容空洞,简而不明。
如果用一两个具体的例子的话,就可以把主题解释清楚了。
比如下段:
Itisnotalwaystruethatapictureisworthathousandwords.Sometimes,picturesareprettyuselessthings.Ifyoucan’tswimandfallintheriverandstartgulpingwater,willyoubebetterofftoholdupapictureofyourselfdrowning,orstartscreaming"
Help"
?
3、连贯性(coherence) 连贯性包括意连和形连两个方面,前者指的是内在的逻辑性,后者指的是使用转换词语。
当然这两者常常是不可分割的。
只有形连而没有意连,句子之间就没有内在的有机的联系;
反之,只有意连而没有形连,有时行文就不够流畅。
1)、意连
段落中句子的排列应遵循一定的次序,不能想到什么就写什么。
如果在下笔之前没有构思,边写边想,写写停停,那就写不出一气呵成的好文章来。
下面介绍几种常见的排列方式。
A.按时间先后排列(chronologicalarrangement)
Wehadanumberofclosecallsthatday.Whenwerose,itwasobviouslylateandwehadtohurrysoasnottomissbreakfast;
weknewthediningroomstaffwasstrictaboutclosingatnineo’clock.Then,whenwehadbeendrivinginthedesertfornearlytwohours-----itmusthavebeenclosetonoon----theheatnearlyhidusin;
theradiatorboiledoverandwehadtousemostofourdrinkingwatertocoolitdown.Bythetimewereachedthemountain,itwasouro’clockandwewereexhausted.Here,judgementranoutofusandwestartedthetoughclimbtothesummit,notrealizingthatdarknesscamesuddenlyinthedesert.Sureenough,bysixwewerestrugglingandAndrewverynearlywentdownasteepcliff,draggingMohammedandmealongwithhim.Bynine,whenthewindhowledacrosstheflatledgeofthesummit,weknewasweshiveredtogetherforwarmththatithadnotbeenourluckyday.
本段从“rose”(起床)写起,然后是吃早餐(“nottomissbreakfast”,“closingatnineo’clock”),然后是“closetonoon”,一直写到这一天结束(“Bynine--”)。
B.按位置远近排列(spatialarrangement)。
Fromadistance,itlookedlikeaskinnytube,butaswegotcloser,wecouldseeitfleshoutbeforeoureyes.Itwastubular,allright,butfatterthanwecouldseefromfaraway.Furthermore,wewerealsoastonishedtonoticethatthebuildingwasreallyintwoparts:
apagodasittingontopofatubularone-storystructure.Standingtenfeetaway,wecouldmarvelathowmuchofthepagodawasmadeupofglasswindows.AlmosteverythingunderthewonderfulChineseroofwasmadeofglass,unlikethetubethatitwassittingon,whichonlyhadfour.Inside,thetubewasgloomy,becauseofthelackoflight.Thenasteep,narrowstaircasetookusupinsidethepagodaandthelightchangeddramatically.Allthosewindowsletinafloodofsunshineandwecouldseeoutformilesacrosstheflatland.
本段的写法是由远及近,从远处(“fromadistance”)写起,然后“getcloser”,再到(“tenfeetaway”),最后是“insidethepagoda”……当然,按位置远近来写不等于都是由远及近。
根据需要,也可以由近及远,由表及里等等。
C.按逻辑关系排列(logicalarrangement)
a.按重要性顺序排列(arrangementinorderofimportance)
Ifyouworkasasodajerker,youwill,ofcourse,notneedmuchskillinexpressingyourselftobeeffective.Ifyouworkonamachine,yourabilitytoexpressyourselfwillbeoflittleimportance.Butassoonasyoumoveonestepupfromthebottom,youreffectivenessdependsonyourabilitytoreachothersthroughthespokenorthewrittenword.Andthefurtherawayyourjobisfrommanualwork,thelargertheorganizationofwhichyouareanemployee,themoreimportantitwillbethatyouknowhowtoconveyyourthoughtsinwritingorspeaking.Intheverylargebusinessorganization,whetheritisthegovernment,thelargecorporation,ortheArmy,thisabilitytoexpressoneselfisperhapsthemostimportantofalltheskillsamancanpossess.
这一段谈的是表达能力,它的重要性与职业,身份有关,从“notneedmuchskill”或“oflittleimportance”到“moreimportant”,最后是“mostimportant”。
b.由一般到特殊排列(general-to-specificarrangement)
Ifareaderislost,itisgenerallybecausethewriterhasnotbeencarefulenoughtokeephimonthepath.Thiscarelessnesscantakeanynumberofforms.Perhapsasentenceissoexcessivelyclutteredthatthereader,hackinghiswaythroughtheverbiage,simplydoesn’tknowwhatitmeans.Perhapsasentencehasbeensoshoddilyconstructedthatthereadercouldreaditinanyofseveralways.Perhapsthewriterhasswitchedtenses,orhasswitchedpronounsinmid-sentence,sothereaderlosestrackofwhentheactiontookplaceorwhoistalking.PerhapssentenceBisnotlogicalsequeltosentenceA----thewriter,inwhoseheadtheconnectionisclear,hasnotbotheredtoprovidethemissinglink.Perhapsthewriterhasusedanimportantwordincorrectlybynottakingthetroubletolookitup.Hemaythinkthat"
sanguine"
and"
sanguinary"
meanthesamething,butthedifferenceisabloodybigone.Thereadercanonlyinferwhatthewriteristryingtoimply.
这一段谈的是awriter’scarelessness,先给出一个generalstatement作为主题句,然后通过5个"perhaps"加以例证。
c.由特殊到一般排列(specific-to-generalarrangement)
IdonotunderstandwhypeopleconfusemySiamesecat,Prissy,withtheoneIhadseveralyearsago,Henry.Thetwocatsareonlyalikeinbreed.Prissy,aquiet,femininefeline,lovesmedearlybutnotpossessively.Shelikestokeepherdistancefrompeople,exertherindependenceandisneversorudeastobeg,lick,orsniffunceremoniously.Herusualpostureissittingupright,eyesclosed,perfectlystill.Prissyisaverypropercat.Henry,ontheotherhand,lovedmedearlybutpossessively.Hewasmyshadowfrommorningtillnight.Heexpectedmetoconstantlyentertainhim.Henrynevercaredwhosawhimdoanything,whetheritwasdecorousornot,andheusuallyoffendedmyfriendsinsomeway.Thecatmadehimselfquitecomfortable,onthetopofthetelevision,acrossstranger’sfeetorlaps,inbeds,drawers,sacks,closets,ornooks.Thedifferencebetweenthemisimperceptibletostrangers.
本段的主题句是段首句,它仅提出一个问题:
为什么两只猫会被搞混。
然后对两者进行比较,末句才下结论。
2)、形连
行文的逻辑性常常要靠适当的转换词语及其他手段来实现。
请读下面这一段文字并找出文中用以承上启下的词语:
Walter’sgoalinlifewastobecomeasuccessfulsurgeon.First,though,hehadtogetthroughhighschool,soheconcentratedallhiseffortsonhisstudies---inparticular,biology,chemistry,andmath.Becauseheworkedconstantlyonthesesubjects,Walterbecameproficientinthem;
however,Walterforgotthatheneededtomasterothersubjectsbesidesthosehehadchosen.Asaresult,duringhisjunioryearofhighschool,WalterfailedbothEnglishandLatin.Consequently,hehadtorepeatthesesubjectsandhewasalmostunabletograduateonschedule.Finally,onJune6,Walterachievedthefirststeptowardrealizinghisgoal.
本文中起承上启下的词语有两种,一种是转换词语(transitionalwordsorphrases),另一种是起转换作用的其他连接手段(linkingdevices)。
前者依次有:
first,though,so,inparticular,and,because,however,besides,asaresult,both…and,consequently,and,finally.后者依次是:
he,he,his,his,he,these,them,he,those,his,he,these,his.本段中共有词汇105个,所使用的转换词语及其他连接用语共26个词,约占该段总词汇量的四分之一。
由此可见,掌握好transitions不仅对行文的流(smoothness)有益,而且对于学生在半个小时内写足四级短文所要求的120个词也是不无好处的。
一个段落里如果没有transitions也就很难有coherence了。
我们看下面一个例子:
Speakingandwritingaredifferentinmanyways.Speechdependsonsounds.Writinguseswrittensymbols.Speechdevelopedabout500000yearsago.Writtenlanguageisarecentdevelopment.Itwasinventedonlyaboutsixthousandyearsago.Speechisusuallyinformal.Thewordchoiceofwritingisoftenrelativelyformal.Pronunciationandaccentoftentellwherethespeakerisfrom.Pronunciationandaccentareignoredinwriting.Astandardd
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