friends第一季第22集剧本Word文档格式.docx
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friends第一季第22集剧本Word文档格式.docx
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mallwayssurprisinglyinadequate.(Monicapatshimonhislap)
Well,lastnightyouseemedtoknowyourwayaroundthetable.
Iloveit,whenweshare.
(Rossgoesovertothecounter.Chandlerfollowshim.)
You'
reokaythere?
Ican'
tbeliveyoutwohadsexinherdream.
I'
msorry,itwasaone-time-thing.Iwasverydrunkandiwassomebodyelse'
ssubconscious.
OpeningCredits
[Scene:
CentralPerk,continuedfromearlier,Chandlerissittingonthetable.]
HelloRachel.
Getoff.
(pointsatJoey'
spen)Uh,uh,gimme.Canyouseemeoperatingadrillpress?
Idon'
tknow.Whatareyouwearing?
(Chandler,MonicaandPhoebelooksathim)
Pheebs,whywouldyouwanttooperateadrillpress?
Justforsomeshort-term-work.Youknow,untilIgetbacksomeofmymassageclients.
Piratesagain?
No,nothinglikethat.Iwasjust...suchadummie.Itaughtthis"
massage-yourself-at-home-workshop."
Andtheyare.
Hey,hey,Chan.Shecouldworkforyou.
(sarcasticly)ThanksJoey,that'
sagoodidea.
What...Icould,Icoulddoit.Whatisit?
Well,mysecretaryisgonnabeoutforacoupleofweeks.Sheishavingoneofherboobsredused.(Rosslooksather.)It'
sawholebigboobstory.
Icouldbeasecretary.
Well,youknowPhoebs.Idon'
tknowifit'
syourkindathing,becauseitinvolvesalotofbeingnormal.Foralargeportionoftheday.
Icoulddothat.
(Ross'
sbeepergoesoff)
Whatareyouplayingwith?
Oh,it'
smynewbeeper.
Whatthehelldoesapaleontologistneedabeeperfor?
Isitlikefordinosauremergencies.'
Help,comequick,they'
restillextinct.'
No,it'
sforwhenCarolgoesintolabor.ShecangetmewhereverIam.Imean,allshehastodoistodial55-JIMBO.
Acoolphonenumber,andapossiblenameforthekid.
Allright,I'
llseeyouguyslater.(raises)
OfftoseeyoungEthan?
Thankyou.
HowyoungisyoungEthan?
Young?
He'
s...ourage.
Whenwewere?
Okay,he'
saseniorincollege.
College?
Whoa!
Andthismanchildhasnoproblemwithhowoldyouare?
No,ofcoursenot.It'
snotevenanissue.CauseItoldhimIwas22.
All:
What?
Oh,Ican'
tpassfor22?
Well,maybe25-26.
Iam26.
Thereyougo.
Chandler'
soffice,heandPhoebearetherewhenthephonestartsringing.]
Canyouhearthat?
(playswithathumbtackremover)Yeah?
Seethat'
llstopwhenyoupickupthephone.
Oh.Uh,I'
mon.(picksupthephone)
(withadeepvoice)Mr.Bing'
soffice.(Listens)NoI'
msorry,he'
sinameetingrightnow.
mnotinameeting.I'
mright...Whoops.
Willheknowwhatthisisinreferenceto?
(Listens)Andhehasyournumber?
(Listens)Allright,I'
llseethathegetsthemessage.Byebye.
Rosssayshi.
Ah!
Thisissofun.Allright,whatdowedonow?
Well,now,Iactuallyhavetogettowork.
Mostlikely.(raisesandgoestowardthedoor)Okay,I'
mgonnabeoutthere.
Okay.
Allright.Byebye.
Byebye.
(Theintercombuzzes)
(answeringit)Yes?
Whatchadoin'
?
Ooh.(leansagainstthedesk)
MonicaandRachel'
s,MonicaandRachelarethere.Monicaisjustfinishingcleaningthewindows.]
Windowsareclean,candelsarelit.Uh,belt'
stotight,gottachangethebelt.DidIturnthefish?
(goesovertothekitchentocheckonthedinner)No,causeImadelasagne.(toRachel)AmIoutofcontrol?
Justatouch.Mon,Idon'
tunderstand.Imean,you'
vebeendatingthisguysincelike,what...hismidterms?
Imean,whyallthesuddenareyouso...Oh.
CouldtonightbetheNight?
tknow.Lookhe'
sagreatguyandIlovebeingwithhimbut...youknow.Thingshappen,andtheyhappen.Youdon'
tplanthesethings.
So,didyoushaveyourlegs?
Yeah.
A-ha!
CentralPerk.JoeyandRossarethere.]
WouldyouletitgoRoss.Itwasjustadream.Itdoesn'
tmean...
Oh,oh.Oh,oh.Ohthisisit.Ohmygodit'
sbabytime.Babytime.
Allright,relax,relax.Justrelax,justrelax.Becool,becool.
(Rossdialsanumberonhiscellularphone)
(onphone)Yeah,hi,Iwasjustbeeped.(pause)No,Andr?
isnothere.(toJoey)Thirdtimetoday.(onphone)Yes,I'
msure...No,sir.Idon'
tperformthosekindofservices.
Services?
(Rosslooksathim)Oh,services.
(onphone)Yeah,youwant55-JUMBO.Yeah,that'
sright.That'
sright,JUMBOwithaU,sir.(pause)No,beliveme,youdon'
twantme.Judgingbyhisnumber,I'
dbeahugedisappointment.(pause)Allrightie,byebye.
(PhoebeandChandlerenter)
Hey,hey.Howwasthefirstday?
Oh,exellent.Everyonewasso,sonice.
See,itpaystoknowthemanwhowearsmyshoes.(JoeyandRosswonderwhathemeans)Me.
No,Ididn'
ttellanybodythatIknewyou.
Whynot?
Oh,because,youknow...theydon'
tlikeyou.
!
Ithoughtyouknewthat.
Noho.Whodoesn'
ttheylikeme?
Everyone.Exceptforuh...noeveryone.
Whatareyoutalkingabout?
Don'
tfeelbad.Youknowtheyusedtolikeyoualot.Butthenyougotpromoted,and,youknow,nowyou'
relike"
Mr.BossMan"
.Youknow,Mr.Bing.Mr.Bing,"
BossManBing"
.
(JoeyandRosslaughs)
tbeliveit.
Yeah,yeah.Theyevendoyou.
Theydome?
Youknowlike...uhokay...uh...'
Couldthatreportbeanylater?
'
tsoundlikethat.
Oh,ohChandler...
Oh...Yeah,youdo.
'
Thehillswerealivewiththesoundofmusic.'
(Phoebe,JoeyandRosslaughs)
(reachesforhiscones)Myscones.
Phoebe,Joey,andRoss:
Myscones.'
(Phoebe,JoeyandRosslaughsagain)
Okay,Idon'
tsoundlikethat.Thatissonottrue.
(JoeyandChandlerlaughs)
Thatissonot...Thatissonot...That...Oh,shutup!
(Phoebe,JoeyandRosslaugh)
s,MonicaandYoungEthanaresittinginthecouch.]
Didnot.
YoungEthan:
Iamtellingyou,upuntilIwas,likenine,Ithoughtthatgunpointwasanactualplacewherecrimeshappen.
Howwasthatpossible?
Well,thinkaboutit.It'
salwaysonthenews.'
Amanisbeingheldup,atgunpoint.'
Touristsarebeingterrorised,atgunpoint.'
AndIjustkeptthinking:
whydoespeoplecontinuetogothere?
(Hecheckshiswatch.)Oh,ah.Ishouldgo.
(Theykiss)
Unless...
Uh,ah.Unlessyouwannastayover?
Imean,I'
mgoingto,so...
Yeah,I'
dreallylikethat.
Uuh,beforewegetintoanystaying-over-stuff,thereissomethingyoushouldknow.
Okay,isthislike'
Ihaveanearlyclasstomorrow'
or'
I'
msecretlymarriedtoagoat?
Wellit'
ssomewhereinbetween.Yousee,inastrictlytechnicalsense,ofcourse,I'
mnotuh...,wellI,ImeanIhaven'
teveruh...
Ethan?
Yeah?
Areyouavirgin?
Well,ifthat'
swhatyoukidsarecallingitthesedaysthen,yesIam.Iuh,I'
vekindabeenwaitingfortherightperson.
Really?
Yeah.YoudoknowIwastalkingaboutyou,right?
[Timelapse.TheyarenowinMonica'
sbedroom,onthebed.]
Youkeepsayingthat.
Youknow,youreadaboutit,youseeitinthemovies.Evenwhenyoupracticeitathome,manohman,itisnothinglikethat.
Listen,uh,youtoldmesomethingthatwasreallydifficultforyou.AndI,I-Ifiguredifyoucouldbehonest,thenIcanto.
Ohgod,don'
ttellme,Ididitwrong.
No-no.Nothingwrongaboutthat.
Oh.
Um,okay,hereitgoes.I'
mnot22.I'
m,I'
m25...andthirteenmonths.
Huh!
ButIfigured,youknow,thatshouldn'
tchangeanything.Imean,whatthehelldoesitmatterhowoldweare.
Uh,listenum,aslongaswe'
retellingstuff,uh,Ihaveanotheroneforyou.I'
malittleyoungerthanIsaid.
renotasenior?
Oh,I'
masenior...inHighSchool.
Ok...ay.
CommercialBreak
Monica'
sBedroom,continuedfromearlier.]
Whatwedidwaswrong.Ohgod,Ijusthadsexwithsomebodythatwasn'
taliveduringtheBicentennial.
Ijusthadsex.
Ethan,focus.Howcouldyounottellme?
Well,younevertoldmehowoldyouwere.
Well,that'
sdifferent.Myliedidn'
tmakeoneofusafelonin48states.Whatwereyouth
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